A: When I was a kid, I really liked Bobby Davro. I did, I also liked self-harm and bedwetting.

F: If you dis him one more time, I'll slash you up.
A: OK.
F: I'm gonna give you a Chinese burn and then Kristen's gonna pour…
A: Pot Noodle on me?
F: Yeah go on… cream soda this time.
A: And then some dragons are going to fly in and put bubbles in my head. Is that how it works? You say funny words and it works, does it? You just throw out weird words: Hippopotamus and juggling, is that what happens? Anyone can do that! I've got fact-based jokes!
F: Don't… make me cut the stuffing out of your pillow.
A: With a pair of scissors, made of glitter?
F: No! With a motorbike made of jealousy.